10 key to find Happiness in Life

1. Live on purpose. Joyful aliveness connects you with your purpose. Learn the skills you need to create happiness. Discover the activities and pursuits that make your heart sing! These engaging activities provide clues to your purpose and will assist you in finding happiness.

If you want to maintain desperation and unhappiness, then believe that life has no purpose.

2. Find Happiness right now. No other time exists for experiencing happiness. Only the present moment contains the spark of life!

You may also create misery by constantly wanting to speed ahead to some other time. Most people live their lives wanting to exist elsewhere and elsewhen.

3. Accept total responsibility for your life! You create your reality and your emotions. Your power and focus exceed your wildest dreams. You can choose to blame and whine, pretending that your life situation came from without, rather than from within. As within, so without. Accept total responsibility for all.

4. Act in boldness. Take on challenges and pursue lofty goals. Overcoming difficulties and obstacles provide some of the most exquisite joys in life.

To create misery, play it totally safe. Never do anything scary or risky. Follow your fears and let them guide your actions. For happiness and joy - feel the fear, and do it anyway!

5. Expect happiness. Hope consists of a perfect expectation of desirable things to come. Picture desirable things to come. You choose what to think about, and what to visualize in your mind's eye! Imagine yourself finding happiness.

Despair consists of a perfect expectation of undesirable things to come. To increase despair, simply imagine in detail terrible things that may happen to you. The better your imagination, the deeper the despair. You get what you truly expect, so expect happiness.

6. Increase your awareness. Feel your emotions consciously. Identify your core beliefs. Constantly learn and grow from the inside. Your unhealthy attitudes, habits, and behaviors will start to drop away like fall leaves.

To maintain apathy and misery, just remain unaware. Allow clarity to flee from you like a deer from a hunter. Remain in unconsciousness and cloudiness - afraid to explore your beliefs.

7. Build your connections. Our relationships give life meaning and happiness. All of us truly connect to one another in the inner world. Building connections in the physical world builds on this inner reality and helps us in finding happiness.

To create misery, simply separate yourself from others. Think that you exist as an independent entity, and other people merely drag you down. Insist on separateness and division. Deny the truth of connectedness and pursue unreality.

8. Learn and read daily. We grow in large measure due to the people we meet and the books we read. Did you read 52 books last year? Did you foster more friendships? We create happiness when we grow and increase our wisdom.

To prevent happiness, try not to meet any new people this year, and don't read any new books either. Simply stay just the same person with the exact same ideas. For optimal joy, go for optimal growth and learning!

9. Serve other people. Truly recognize other people as real people, with needs and wants just like your own. Think how you can bring a smile to someone, and then do it! Give increased life in every encounter. Service is a huge key for finding happiness in your life.

To create misery, ignore other people and totally concern yourself with your own needs. Don't think of other people as real.

10. Prioritize your actions. Know your goals and purposes, and put power and faith into every action. Do each action with focus and purpose, and know why you choose the activities you expend your energy on.

Value of Peace

Value: Peace To experience peace is to be in one powerful stage.Contemplation:

The more the thoughts we have, the lesser the peace that is experienced
in the mind. When we are able to maintain a powerful thought
throughout the day whatever the situations come our way we can
experience constant peace.

Application:

Right in the morning let me take a thought that is positive and
powerful. For example, ‘victory is my birthright’ or ‘I am always
fortunate’. Whatever the situations I come across, let me emerge this
thought and I will be able to maintain peace.

The Power of Positive Thinking

Rules are what we use to define life. People do not realize this, but we need rules in order to appreciate life more. Rules take the chaos that is called life and impose order into it. Some people think rules limit our achievements, but this is not true. When you think about it, you will realize the fact that rules protect our progress as humanity. Without rules, we would have been extinct long ago.

Rules help us define life. Sometimes, we look for rules in order to help us achieve our goals. People create rules in order to help themselves achieve their goals in a manner that they can understand. Rules are also used to help us comprehend life. People give out rules in order to help others get what they have achieved. It is because of rules that we are able to hold on to every discovery made.

It comes as no surprise that people look for 10 rules for the power of positive thinking. It seems that people, when looking for rules, like to stick no 10, which is a nice, round number.

The power of positive thinking and 10 rules in getting it is one of the most popular subjects out there. This is because they have begun to realize that positive thinking does affect life significantly. Whether you see a glass as half-empty or half-full can affect the way you treat your business. We are in control of our lives and our decisions matter.

What are the 10 rules of the power of positive thinking?

Believe - You cannot pretend to be a positive thinker. You need to believe. In positive thinking, you cannot pretend because there’s no one to pretend to. If somebody believes that you are a positive thinker, how can that benefit you? The most important of the 10 rules of the power of positive thinking is that you should believe it.

Be objective - This is very important in the 10 rules for the power of positive thinking. Many people tend to see their lives for their failures and thus, they lose hope of ever succeeding in their goal. Other people tend to magnify their success and, filled with false pride, they make all the wrong decisions.
Take care of your health - One step to achieving the power of positive thinking is taking care of your body. All of the positive thinking in the world can’t help you if you are dead, can it? You need to have a healthy body in order to fuel your positive thinking.
Surround yourself with positive people - When you are engaged in an internal struggle between your positive self and your negative self, you will need all the support you can get. You do not really want to surround yourself with people who will just kick your positive attitude to the ground with their negativity.
Be patient - Positive thinking does not come overnight. You need to train yourself in order to get rid of any negative attitude you possess.
Turn negativity around - When something negative enters your personality get rid of it not by repelling it outright, but by channeling that energy into positive thoughts.

Remember that others can sense your negativity - One reason why people fail is because other people can sense their negativity and want no part of it. Before you try to do something, be sure to have the right attitude.
Find something positive in everything new - When you encounter something unfamiliar, never do what most people do and fear it. Take a hard look at it and see it for the positive effects it brings, this will help you understand things better.

Pace yourself - Remember that you cannot hurry into getting positive. You need to pace yourself in order to prevent yourself from breaking down. Go slowly and take life one day at a time.
Make the change – The main characteristic of these ten rules of the power of positive thinking is the fact that they only show you the door. You need to open it yourself.

10 Principles that could change your way of life

Stop and ask yourself today, “How do I really feel about myself?” Before you answer read these ten principles.
Better yet, keep them before you daily.
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(1) Never think or speak negatively about yourself; that puts you in disagreement with God.
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(2) Meditate on your God-given strengths and learn to encourage yourself, for much of the time nobody else will.
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(3) Don’t compare yourself to anybody else. You’re unique, one of a kind, an original. So don’t settle for being a copy.
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(4) Focus on your potential, not your limitations. Remember, God lives in you!
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(5) Find what you like to do, do well, and strive to do it with excellence.
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(6) Have the courage to be different. Be a God pleaser, not a people pleaser.
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(7) Learn to handle criticism. Let it develop you instead of discourage you.
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(8) Determine your own worth instead of letting others do it for you. They’ll short-change you!
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(9) Keep your shortcomings in perspective - you’re still a work in progress.
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(10) Focus daily on your greatest source of confidence - the God Who lives in you !

12 Ways to Stay on Top of Stress

It takes a million years for one gene to change in our bodies. One million years! I’m bringing this up because, physiologically, we’re the same humans we were 300 years ago. But look at how things have changed in that short time. Some things make life easier now: washers and dryers, transportation, abundance of food, electricity, etc. But some things make life today more insane: cell phones, traffic, increased population, fake food, TV, busy schedules. I heard a statistic from a doctor-friend that we make more decisions in one day than people used to make in a year. No wonder we’re stressed out and reaching for doughnuts or alcohol to cope.

All this craziness and high-speed living isn’t going away. Since we can’t change our genes, we have to create a map to navigate this crazy life. What can you do to try and stay on top of the stress so it doesn’t affect your health, happiness, or waistline?

1. Exercise. Amen for endorphins. Believe me, they’ve helped me many days with my perspective. If you have to work out, then go take a brisk walk and get that blood flowing. It isn’t about working out to lose weight — it’s about being healthy and staying sane.

2. Eat the real stuff. Crappy food (fast, processed, and loaded with sugar) doesn’t help your chemical brain and body handle stress. Living food, real food, helps support your mind and body while it’s trying to deal with the million things coming its way. Every time I reach for the chocolate, I’m looking to feel something from it. Don’t get me wrong — if it’s just a little here and there because I enjoy the taste of it, great. But if I’m using it the minute I feel overwhelmed, then that’s when that food is no longer OK to eat. It doesn’t make the problem go away, and then I just feel bad about eating the food to pacify myself. Grab green food instead. Put things in your mouth that are going to support your immune function and keep you levelheaded.

3. Notice. Try not to let the stress overtake you. Recognize the situations that cause the stress and notice them coming your way. You have a better shot at fending off the full effects of the stress when you can anticipate it.

4. Get it off your chest. Talk to a friend or partner about the stress. Sometimes just getting it off your chest can help unload some of the burden.
5. Keep your sense of humor. If you do have the chance to talk about it, try to see the irony and humor in the wacky bits. I think someone is dead in the water once they lose their sense of humor.

6. Stay grateful. My daughter has large lungs and verbal skills she likes to display. Just when I start to wishfully think about her being quiet, I remind myself to be grateful that she can talk to me at all. In almost all of our problems are boatloads of blessings. “Oh, I don’t feel like going to the gym.” Well, Amen that you have the means and the health to even be able to wrestle with the idea of going to work out. Make a habit of saying thank you. You will notice the sunny spots a lot more often, and not just the gray skies and storms.

7. Ask, “What’s the hurry?” Have some fun. We’re always so busy going somewhere, we miss just enjoying the moment. If an opportunity comes your way to do something fun, take it.

8. Take a deep breath. When you feel the stress getting to you, take a moment. Get away, even if it’s just for an hour, to be with yourself and your thoughts. Some people like to take a walk, meditate, lock themselves away in a beautiful bath, or go to church. Find the peace and the silence.

9. Keep it simple. Simplify where you can. Does Junior really need to be in 78 activities at the age of 5? Do you have to go to every little party or gathering you’re invited to?

10. Turn of the TV. A lot of it is bad news anyway, and it robs us of hours that we could use to be getting other things done. Since everyone complains that they have no time, get some by unplugging from the tube.

11. Sleep. If you’re rested, you have a better shot at handling things. Not to mention, you may not stress out as easily if you have a chance to recover at night.

12. Drink water. I have said it before: Americans consume 21 percent of their calories through liquid consumption. Hydrate with water. Help you entire system function better just by drinking enough water. Oh, and by the way, if you don’t think that weight loss and proper hydration have a relationship, think again. Shift the paradigm on its side — don’t think about exercise and nutritional eating just as something you have to suffer through to get into those jeans. Instead, think of them as armor that will protect you in this crazy world, with all of the bazillion details you deal with every day.

Public Speaking Tips

Ensure your speech will be captivating to your audience as well as worth their time and attention. Videotape your presentation and analyze it. Emphasize your strong points during your presentation.
Be solemn if your topic is serious. Present the desired image to your audience. Appear relaxed, even if you feel nervous. Establish rapport with your audience. If a microphone is available, adjust and adapt your voice accordingly.
Master the use of presentation software such as PowerPoint well before your presentation. Persuade your audience effectively. Speak loudly and clearly. Sound confident. Maintain sincere eye contact with your audience. If what you have prepared is obviously not getting across to your audience, change your strategy mid-stream if you are well prepared to do so. Allow yourself and your audience a little time to reflect and think. Keep audience interested throughout your entire presentation. Remember that an interesting speech makes time fly, but a boring speech is always too long to endure even if the presentation time is the same.
Check out the location ahead of time to ensure seating arrangements for audience, whiteboard, blackboard, lighting, location of projection screen, sound system, etc. are suitable for your presentation.
Tell audience ahead of time that you will be giving out an outline of your presentation so that they will not waste time taking unnecessary notes during your presentation.
Here are just a few hints, public speaking tips and techniques to help you develop your skills and become far more effective as a public speaker.

Mistakes
Mistakes are all right.
Recovering from mistakes makes you appear more human.
Good recovery puts your audience at ease - they identify with you more.

How to use the public speaking environment
Try not to get stuck in one place.
Use all the space that’s available to you.
Move around.
One way to do this is to leave your notes in one place and move to another.
If your space is confined (say a meeting room or even presenting at a table) use stronger body language to convey your message.

Tell stories
Stories make you a real person not just a deliverer of information.
Use personal experiences to bring your material to life.
No matter how dry your material is, you can always find a way to humanise it.
Technology
Speak to your audience not your slides.
Your slides are there to support you not the other way around.
Ideally, slides should be graphics and not words (people read faster than they hear and will be impatient for you to get to the next point).
If all the technology on offer fails, it’s still you they’ve come to hear.
Humour
Tell jokes if you’re good at telling jokes.
If you aren’t good, best to leave the jokes behind.
There’s nothing worse than a punch line that has no punch.
Gentle humour is good in place of jokes.
Self-deprecation is good, but try not to lay it on too thick.

You can learn to enjoy public speaking and become far more effective at standing in front of a group of people and delivering a potent message.
And remember to keep practicing!

Quick Tips to Improve Self Confidence

Here are some quick tips to improve your Self Confidence. If we are committed to have a healthy self confidence there are many things you can do every day to boost your self confidence, each small steps that will help you to reach your goal. The good news is that self-esteem is not fixed and can be improved, try some of the steps below to boost your confidence and self-esteem.

1) Identify your successes. Everyone is good at something, so discover the things at which you excel, then focus on your talents. Give yourself permission to take pride in them. Give yourself credit for your successes. Inferiority is a state of mind in which you’ve declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized.

2) Look in the mirror and smile. Studies surrounding what’s called the “facial feedback theory” suggest that the expressions on your face can actually encourage your brain to register certain emotions. So by looking in the mirror and smiling every day, you might feel happier with yourself and more confident in the long run.

3) Exercise and eat healthy. Exercise raises adrenaline and makes one feel happier and healthier. It is certainly an easy and effective way to boost your self-confidence.
4) Turn feelings of envy or jealousy into a desire to achieve. Stop wanting what others have just because they have it; seek things simply because you want them, whether anybody else has them or not.

5) When you’re feeling superbly insecure, write down a list of things that are good about you. Then read the list back. You’d be surprised at what you can come up with.

6) Don’t be afraid to push yourself a bit - a little bit of pressure can actually show just how good you are!

7) You can try taking a martial arts or fitness class/course (or both). This will help build confidence and strength.

Invest in some new clothing and donate some of your old clothing to send a message to yourself that you both look sharp and feel sharp.

9) Try to make yourself talk positively at all times. When you hear yourself saying you can’t do something, stop and say you can. Unless you try, you will never know whether you are able to or not.

10) Don’t get wrapped up in your mistakes and dwell on bad points; they can contrast your good points or even give you something to improve. There’s no feeling like being good at something you were really bad at.

11) Don’t confuse what you have with who you are. People degrade their self worth when comparing possessions.

12) Surround yourself with nurturing friends, not overly critical individuals who make you feel inadequate or insecure. This could do great harm and damage to your self confidence.

8 Gift from God

1) THE GIFT OF LISTENING…
But you must REALLY listen. No interrupting, no daydreaming, no planning your response. Just listening.
2) THE GIFT OF AFFECTION…
Be generous with appropriate hugs, kisses, pats on the back and handholds. Let these small actions demonstrate the love you have for family and friends.
3) THE GIFT OF LAUGHTER…
Clip cartoons. Share articles and funny stories. Your gift will say, “I love to laugh with you.”
4) THE GIFT OF A WRITTEN NOTE…
It can be a simple “Thanks for the help” note or a full sonnet. A brief, handwritten note may be remembered for a lifetime, and may even change a life.
5) THE GIFT OF A COMPLIMENT…
A simple and sincere, “You look great in red,” “You did a super job” or “That was a wonderful meal” can make someone’s day.
6) THE GIFT OF A FAVOR…
Every day, go out of your way to do something kind.
7) THE GIFT OF SOLITUDE…
There are times when we want nothing better than to be left alone. Be sensitive to those times and give the gift of solitude to others.
8) THE GIFT OF A CHEERFUL DISPOSITION…
The easiest way to feel good is to extend a kind word to someone, really it’s not that hard to say, “Hello” or “Thank you.”

Before starting

Before you think of saying an unkind word
Think of someone who can’t speak

Before you complain about the taste of your food
Think of someone who has nothing to eat

Before you complain about your husband or wife
Think of someone who’s crying out to God for a companion

Today before you complain about life
Think of someone who went too early to heaven

Before you complain about your children
Think of someone who desires children but they’re barren

Before you argue about your dirty house; someone didn’t clean or sweep
Think of the people who are living in the streets

Before whining about the distance you drive
Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet

And when you are tired and complain about your job
Think of the unemployed, the disabled and those who wished they had your job

But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another
Remember that not one of us are without sin and we all answer to one maker

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down
Put a smile on your face and thank God you’re alive and still around

Life is a gift
Live it…
Enjoy it…
Celebrate it…
And fulfill it.

22 Best of Best thing happen in Life

1. Falling in love.
2. Laughing till your stomach hurts.
3. Enjoying a ride down the Country side.
4. Listening to your favorite song on the radio.
5. Going to sleep listening to the rain pouring outside.
6. Getting out of the shower and wrapping yourself with a warm, fuzzy
towel.
7. Passing your final exams with good grades.
8. Being part of an interesting conversation.
9. Finding some money in some old pants.
10. Laughing at yourself.
11. Sharing a wonderful dinner with all your friends.
12. Laughing without a reason.
13. “Accidentally” hearing someone say something good about you.
14. Watching the sunset.
15. Listening to a song that reminds you of an important person in
your
life.
16. Receiving or giving your first kiss.
17. Feeling this movement in your body when seeing this “special”
someone.
18. Having a great time with your friends.
19. Seeing the one you love happy.
20. Wearing the shirt of a person you love and smelling his/her
perfume.
21. Visiting an old friend of yours and remembering great memories.
22. Hearing some telling you “I LOVE YOU”
True friends come in the good times when we tell them to, and come in
the bad times…..without calling.”

No Expectations from anybody

EXPECTATIONS- It’s natural in every person to expect in return for something he/she has done for someone.
Parents expect their son will support them during their oldage, so they give him best education and fulfill all his needs. But in reality will it happen as they expected, No, in my observations I have seen many parents crying for their destiny for such a son who has no respect towards them. In present society very few children lookafter their parents with respect during their old age as a responsibility. Merely looking after is not sufficient, but it should be with respect. By admitting them in old age home and paying the maintanance fee is not the responsiblity completed.

Even a true doodhwala will not sell a cow to a butcher when it becomes old, he looks after it well till its death, a true dog lover will not abandon the dog when it becomes old.

If you don’t expect anything in return then you are the happiest person with peace of mind(e.g.Sanyasi), but it is quiet natural in the human nature to have expectations. In many fields if you don’t have expectations then you are going to die. If you don’t expect wages for your work then how you are going to survive.

EXPECTATION is part of a life, but the result of the expectation many times will be bitter than sweet as expected.

Always one should not have expectation from his children during their old age, as a parent it is one’s responsibility to lookafter them, during old age do not depend on them, atleast financially, then they respect you more.

Do not expect anything from anyone for the good deed you have done to your family or to the society. It is your Dharma and Karma

7 - RULES TO BE HAPPY

1…..Never Hates
2…..Dont Worry
3….Live Simple
4….Expect A Little
5….Give A Lot
6….Always Smile
7….Have Person U Like Most Who, Always Remember U

Some beautiful tips to implement in life

1. God is real, unless declared integer.

2. Before borrowing money from a friend, decide whether you need more.

3. Death is hereditary.

4. There are three sides to every argument: your side, my side and the right side.

5. An expert is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.

6. Many things can be preserved in alcohol. Dignity is not one of them.

7. Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.

8. When you’re right, no one remembers. When you’re wrong, no one forgets.

9. Cheer up, the worst is yet to come .

10. Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.

11. Well done is better than well said .

12. Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make them when nobody is looking.

13. Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.

14. If you can’t see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.

15. Where there’s a will there are five hundred relatives.

16. Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

Positive approach towards Life

Living on Earth is expensive,
but it does include a free trip
around the sun every year.

Birthdays are good for you;
the more you have,
the longer you live.

Happiness comes through doors you
didn’t even know you left open.

Ever notice that the people who are late
are often much jollier
than the people who have to wait for them?

How long a minute is
depends on what side of the
bathroom door you’re on .


Most of us go to our grave
with our music still inside of us.
If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day,
how come nothing is free yet?

You may be only one person in the world,
but you may also be the world to one person.

mistakes are too much fun
to only make once.

Don’t cry because it’s over;
smile because it happened.

We could learn a lot from crayons:
some are sharp, some are pretty,
some are dull, some have weird names,
and all are different colors….but
they all exist very nicely in the same box.

A truly happy person is one who
can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

Have an awesome day, and
know that someone
who thinks you’re great
has thought about you today!

“And that person was me.”

Working for God on earth does not pay much,
but His Retirement plan is out of this world.

How to manage yourself

You are responsible for everything that happens in your life. Learn to accept total responsibility for yourself. If you do not manage yourself, then you are letting others have control of your Life. These tips will help “you” manage “you.”

Here is a list of things that help you in self management and which will in turn lead you to the path of success: -

-) Look at every new opportunity as an exciting and new-life experience.

-) Be a professional who exhibits self-confidence and self-assurance in your potential to complete any task.

-) Agree with yourself in advance that you will have a good attitude toward the upcoming task.

-) Frequently ask, “Is what I am doing right now moving me toward my goals?”

-) Do it right the first time and you will not have to take time later to fix it.

-) Accept responsibility for your job successes and failures. Do not look for a scapegoat.

-) Do not view things you do as a “job.” View all activities as a challenge.

-) Use your subconscious mind by telling it to do what you do want. Instead of telling yourself, “I can’t do that very well,” say, “I can do this very well.”

-) Give yourself points for completing tasks on your “to-do” list in priority order. When you reach 10 points, reward yourself.

-) Practice your personal beliefs. It may be helpful each morning to take 15 minutes to gather your thoughts and say a prayer.

-) Make a commitment to show someone a specific accomplishment on a certain date. The added urgency will help you feel motivated to have it done.

-) Practice self-determination, wanting to do it for yourself.

-) Believe that you can be what you want to be.

-) Never criticize yourself as having a weakness. There is no such thing. You are only talking about a present undeveloped skill or part of yourself that if you so chose, you can change. You do not have any weakness, only untapped potential.

-) Be pleasant all the time-no matter what the situation.

-) Challenge yourself to do things differently than you have in the past. It provides new ideas and keeps you interested.

-) Talk to yourself. A self-talk using positive affirmation is something that is common among all great achievers. They convince themselves that they can accomplish their goals.

-) Create your own “motivation board” by putting up notes of things you need to do on a bulletin board or special wall space. It is an easily visible way to see what you need to work on. When an item is done, remove the note. Also keep your goals listed and pictured on your board.

-) Stay interested in what you are doing. Keep looking for what is interesting in your work. Change your perspective and look at it as someone outside your job would,

-) Establish personal incentives and rewards to help maintain your own high enthusiasm and performance level.

How to live Happy Married Relationship

Few annotations to obtain bliss in “Marriage”!! Hey, don’t get surprised. Check this out!!!

This might sound very bizarre to a few people but yes…it is genuinely true that you can obtain bliss in Marriage!

We see a lot of ups and downs in our Married Life. Sometimes, we even think that is this the same person to whom we got married. Whether it is Arranged or Love Marriage, we tend to find some intricacies to get along with the person we marry.When you are dating, you see the person from a different point of view and assume that this would continue even after you marry the person. And, hence do not expect any kind of change in the person’s behaviour at all.

Ironically, we notice a lot of change with the same person after the marriage. Then it becomes very difficult to cope up with the situation at home. You feel infuriated and bewildered. You tend to take up impulsive decisions for which you will be repentant at a later stage. You would certainly be very late in action at that point of time.

With this article, I am just making an effort to give you some inputs to adapt in your marriage to avoid hurting your loved ones!

I suggest, before I start emphasizing further on Marriage, we necessarily need to understand the meaning of Love. In short, Love is not any kind of fascination but an acquaintance which needs adherence. We do not love someone just for the sake of self-security. We predominantly do mean that we love that person very much and he/she is an important aspect of our life and we mean the world to the same person. I am sure, you all would agree with me. With this strong note in mind, I do not think there should be any hitch in understanding the person you love!

Simply put together, I am highlighting the important aspects of Married Life point-wise so that it does not take much of your time to comprehend:

1. LOVE: Love is the basic ingredient to the world of Marriage. Love your spouse a lot. Make him/her feel loved very often. By and large, we think that we need not express the words ‘I LOVE YOU’ to the person we love. But, it is extremely imperative to tell the person how much you love. It should not be said in the literal aspect of it. Mean the word LOVE to your best and look at the person’s eyes when you say. These three words ‘I LOVE YOU’ really makes the person feel very special and you can definitely expect a blush on!

2. UNDERSTANDING: Understanding is the foremost aspect with respect to Marriage. You must and should understand your spouse in depth. The basic intensity in the Marriage lies in Understanding. Try and understand your spouse’s Nature and Needs. Understand even the very craziest things which your spouse likes or dislikes.

3. TRUST: Have faith in your spouse. Never let the skepticism enter your mind. Trust him/her whole heartedly and I challenge, your spouse cannot go wrong. Make your belief on him/her so strong that he/she is infallible i.e. he/she cannot even think of committing any flaws.

4. RESPECT: Respect your spouse as a person he/she is and duly respect their feelings. Make him/her feel that your relationship with them is enormously cherished. Remember! Unless and until you respect your spouse, you cannot expect her/him to respect you and your feelings! Have a high regard to your spouse’s family too.

5. EGO: In one sentence, “Edging God Out”! Do not attempt to do this! I do understand that this is the basic reason why an argument ends in a tiff. Yes, I certainly agree that we all need to satisfy our self-esteems but at the same time, we forget that we are hurting our loved ones just for the sake of our egos. But, now a days, this is the basic reason why many Marriages come to an end. Please note, whenever there is an argument going on; please keep your Egos away! Make sure that this should not hamper your Marriage.

6. TIME: Spend oodles of time with your partner. At any point of time, never let them feel short of your time in their life. You will be able to enjoy even the little things in life only if you spend much time rather quality time with your spouse. As you know, time heals everything - even if you are feeling hostile at times - spending time with your partner can certainly boost up your energy. Go ahead and make much out of such good times. Do not forget to make every little moments most memorable!

7. FINANCE: In monetary issues, if one is dependent on the other or both of the partners are dependent on each other please ensure that he/she do not feel hesitant to spend your money. Make them comfortable and keep them at ease in financial matters. Never indicate that only you have the supremacy in monetary issues with respect to what you have earned.

8. CARE: Caring for your loved ones shows the warmth and concern you have in your relationship. Never neglect your spouse. The greatest pain is not to die, but to be ignored and not cared for. Try and understand even the tiny things about what your spouse needs. This helps in avoiding unnecessary arguments. Carelessness can cause a great mishap in your relationship. Not being cared can lead to loneliness which in turn causes depression in their life. I think everyone on this earth needs care and pamper.

9. SHARE: Sharing your feelings, thoughts, dreams, office talks and even many more things can enrich the equilibrium between the two of you. I would suggest, share even the very minute things with your partner. Never build up distance with your partner by not sharing anything or something. Share each and everything that’s happening in and around your life. This will definitely enhance the grandeur of your relationship.

10. SUPPORT: Supporting your spouse in whatever he/she do will certainly build up confidence in them towards you. Try and support in each and everything in an optimistic manner. Do not criticize their decisions. Always encourage them in whatever they do and make them feel that they do have a person to rely on even at their bad times. Helping your spouse in their household works can do wonders! Amazingly, it really works!

11. DO NOT TRY TO CHANGE YOUR PARTNER: By and large, trying to change our spouse is the most common mistake committed by all of us. Most importantly, we should never try to change them. Accepting him/her as the person they are will definitely eradicate the tantrums in your married life. Remember - you have loved the person as they were in the beginning and trying to change that person might end up in losing your beloved! Rather, the best way is to get adapted to each other’s characteristics!

I assume I have put down all my points to make anyone’s Marriage, a blissful one. By now, I am sure that if anyone who considers the above aspects of Married Life will definitely accomplish Marital Bliss!

Happy Married Life to all of you again! Enjoy your Married Life to the utmost!

The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success

Many of us grew up with the belief that achieving success requires relentless hard work, grim determination and intense ambition. As a result, we may have struggled for years and even reached some of our goals but wound up feeling exhausted, our lives out of balance. The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, such desperate striving isn’t necessary or even desirable. In the natural world, creation comes forth with ease. A seed doesn’t struggle to become a tree?it simply unfolds in grace.

The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success are powerful principles you can use to fulfill your deepest desires with effortless joy. If you put them into practice, you’ll realize that you can manifest whatever you’ve been dreaming about. Fortunately, the laws of success aren’t difficult or mysterious but are easy to understand and apply.

SUNDAY The Law of Pure Potentiality
Take time to be silent, to just BE. Meditate for 30 minutes twice a day. Silently witness the intelligence within every living thing. Practice non-judgment.

MONDAY The Law of Giving
Today, bring whoever you encounter a gift: a compliment or flower. Gratefully receive gifts. Keep wealth circulating by giving and receiving care, affection, appreciation and love.

TUESDAY The Law of Karma
Every action generates a force of energy that returns to us in like kind. Choosing actions that bring happiness and success to others ensures the flow of happiness and success to you.

WEDNESDAY The Law of Least Effort
Accept people, situations, and events as they occur. Take responsibility for your situation and for all events seen as problems. Relinquish the need to defend your point of view.

THURSDAY The Law of Intention and Desire
Inherent in every intention and desire is the mechanics for its fulfillment. Make a list of desires. Trust that when things don’t seem to go your way, there is a reason.

FRIDAY The Law of Detachment
Allow yourself and others the freedom to be who they are. Do not force solutions—allow solutions to spontaneously emerge. Uncertainty is essential, and your path to freedom.

SATURDAY The Law of Dharma
Seek your higher Self. Discover your unique talents. Ask yourself how you are best suited to serve humanity. Using your unique talents and serving others brings unlimited bliss and abundance.

DIFFERENCE BETWEEN “SOMEBODY YOU LOVE ” & SOMEBODY YOU LIKE”

In front of the person you love, your heart beats faster.

But in front of the person you like, you get happy.

In front of the person you love, winter seems like spring.

But in front of the person you like, winter is just beautiful winter.

if you look into the eyes of the one you love, you blush.

But if you look into the eyes of the one you like, you smile.

In front of the person you love, you can’t say everything on your mind.

But in front of the person you like, you can.

In front of the person you love, you tend to get shy.

But in front of the person you like, you can show your own self.

you can’t look straight into the eyes of the one you love.

But you can always smile into the eyes of the one you like.

When the one you love is crying, you cry with them.

But when the one you like is crying, you end up comforting.

The feeling of love starts from the eye.

But the feeling of liking starts from the heart.

Mind vs Mood

You do not need to feel overwhelmed by stress, fear, fatigue, or anxiety. Use these simple mind over mood tips to feel better and calmer.

Staying In the Present

A mind over mood strategy that can be very effective is to stay in the present. This means to focus on things that are going on in your immediate environment. Often times worries and stress are a direct result of focusing on things that have happened in the past or being concerned with things in the future. Staying in the present can be accomplished by making a decision to focus on the simple pleasures in life, like a cup of hot chocolate, or a warm bath.

Using Realistic Self-Talk

It is easy to tell ourselves that things will never get better, that there is no reason for hope, or that life is unfair. These things are simply not the case. Things may feel like they will never get better, but the fact is they usually do. It is a valuable mind over mood tool to be able to talk back to our negative inner voices and remind ourselves of reality.

Laugh

At first sight this might not seem like a mind over mood technique, but it absolutely can be. Laughter can be the result of a decision to engage in behavior that makes laughing likely. This can be implemented by watching comedies, listening to comedians on tape, or scheduling some time with a friend who is makes you laugh. Using it in this way it becomes a mind over mood tool that can increase resiliency to stress and help counteract negative feelings.

Picture a Favorite Place

Using mental imagery to control our moods is nothing new. Many of us as kids, if we were unable to fall asleep at night, were told to picture something pleasant. Now, as adults, we can expand on this idea to create more control over our moods. Think of a place that makes you feel relaxed. Close your eyes and focus on this for a few minutes at a time, once or twice a day. After you have done this for several days you will find it easier to use in stressful situations, where the benefits of picturing a relaxing place can be most evident.

Practice Relaxation Techniques

There are many ways to relax. One way is to listen to music that is calming. Another is to flex each muscle, one at a time, and then relax it A third way is to take deep breaths and allow your stomach to rise and fall, which is a way to calm your body, and can counteract our tendency to take short, shallow breaths. Whichever method used, relaxation techniques are a good way to start the day and end it, in addition to any time where you are needing to relax.

How to keep yourself burning

Necessary reasons to keep your desire to learn. Have you ever pondered upon how fundamental learning is to your life in terms of your ability to not only survive but also to thrive both professionally and personally? Becoming a lifelong learner is important to your health, your success, and your happiness, but if that is not enough reason to learn more then consider these three fundamental reasons to keep your desire to learn and to live and learn.

Change is necessary part of life. If humans did not change then we would not have survived as long as we have upon this planet. Change is important, even essential, but while key that change does not need to be something huge and momentous. Small changes are often daunting enough and can still lead to big rewards.

Learning can increase your strengths. The old adage "the more you learn, the more you learn you don't know" holds true in almost every field of knowledge and human experience. There is always something more you can learn even if you are an expert and few of us hold such expertise that we cannot learn something new.

Learning helps you challenge yourself. If you do not challenge yourselve to learn and grow, whether it is a physical or mental skill, then you begin to die. While that may sound harsh, it is simply reality. Learning keeps you young both physically and mentally because it gives your life direction and fosters your will to live. Discovery and learning is healthy and essential to thriving as a human being no matter what your age.

These are just three fundamental reasons to keep your desire to learn that should give you food for thought and hopefully start you on the road to learning more and improving yourself today, tomorrow, and all the tomorrows to come. Now go forth and live and learn so you too can reap the benefits of becoming a lifelong learner!

How to get whatever you dream

Are you often overcome with feelings of anxiety and discouragement because of the daily pressures and obstacles you face?

Have you sat in wonder of how some individuals seem to handle life's curve balls with seeming ease and optimism? Perhaps you've been frustrated by a friend or family member's ability to see the best in life simply because you can't understand where their 'eternal sunshine' comes from.

Don't worry - you're not alone. Many people find that pressure at work, hectic family routines and a lack of energy take away much of the enjoyment in life they used to have. If you've simply forgotten how to look at life in a positive light, or if you've faced obstacles such as loss of work or illness that have overshadowed the rest of your life, check out these steps to bring joy back into your life.

KEEP CONNECTED:

Perhaps in your rush to get everything done and stay on top of it all, you've forgotten to stay connected to your friends and family.

Even scientific studies have agreed that happy people have good relationships, so if you're feeling in a funk why not call a friend, go for a coffee or arrange some down time with your husband or children? The interaction can give you an energy boost and help you set priorities that really bring you joy.

REMIND YOURSELF ABOUT THE GOOD:

It may sound redundant, but taking time to think about what IS good in your life can really increase your happiness.

Are you feeling down about something at work or how you've been dealing with your kids? Combat those feelings by consciously thinking about what you've done RIGHT. While acknowledging where you can improve is good for you, beating yourself up about mistakes or unfairness will only break your spirit.

GET A HOBBY:

Sometimes all we need is a little diversion to bring happiness back into our life. Challenging yourself and enriching your life with interests outside of your daily routine can bring back a zest that may have been missing.

DO SOMETHING FOR SOMEONE ELSE:

It's easy to become absorbed with your own problems and disappointments, but simply looking beyond your immediate surroundings and seeing where you can help others can bring great feelings of satisfaction and joy.

You don't have to do much - holding the door for someone, bringing your co-worker a coffee or picking up groceries for an elderly neighbor can fuel your 'feel good' chemicals and remind you that happiness comes from our own attitudes and actions.

If despite your efforts you feel that your lack of enjoyment in life may be linked to more serious conditions such as depression or anxiety disorders, please consult your physician about necessary steps you must take to get back on track.

Create Happiness

It has already been determined, and is a given fact, that the mind rules the body totally. But that is not to say that the current condition of the body does not affect the mind in some ways.

When the body experiences pain, or any other negative physical state, the mind IS affected. The goal here is to use this to create a state of happiness.
Let’s perform a quick experiment. Stand up and hold both your arms out to the sides of your body, perpendicular to the floor. Move them in small circles. Keep doing it.

Soon, you will feel a burn in both shoulders. Keep doing it.

After a time, your shoulders will begin to ache terribly. Now the pain is all you can think about. Keep doing it.

If you can keep doing it, eventually you will feel excruciating pain. Your breath will become labored. Your face will turn red. You will breathe faster and faster through pursed lips. Keep doing it until you can do it no longer.

Now, notice your state of mind. You will find that you are quite likely ready to scream...

Now drop your arms and take some deep breaths. Notice your state of mind now. Relief. You are happy that it is finally over.

The state of the body CAN affect the mind in this way. But what if we could reverse this process? What if we could create a pleasurable state in the body? How would the mind be affected? This, for some of us, is the classical definition of sex. More about that later.

Try this simple experiment. Stop reading for a moment. Now frown as hard as you can, and hold the frown for about 30 seconds.

Next, make the face you make when you smell something terrible. Hold this expression for another 30 seconds.

Now, change again and smile as hard as you can for about 30 seconds.

Ok, now go back and frown as hard as you can again. Notice how you feel. You feel very negative, don’t you?

Again, make the face you make when you smell something very bad. Hold. Notice how you feel. Again, it is not a pleasant feeling, is it?

And finally, smile very hard and note your feelings now. Feels good, doesn’t it.

Your mind is conditioned to create a mental response to a somatic condition. This has been conditioned into you since birth. Here is how this can work to your advantage.

Find a place where you will not be disturbed for a few moments. Stand very still and close your eyes. Now, imagine in your mind an experience that has caused you great mental pain in the past. This could be a failed relationship or maybe a situation where others made fun of you in public. Whatever. Make certain, though, that this situation caused intense distress.

Go over the incident in your mind. The goal is to vividly imagine the pain you experienced.

How did you feel?
What did you see?
What did you hear?
Who was there?
What emotions did you experience?

Work yourself into a controlled frenzy. Make the experience as real as possible. Feel it. Feel it. FEEL IT.

You are now in a terrible state of mind. Notice your feelings of pain, anguish, hatred, disgust, whatever. Make it hurt. Make it hurt bad. Now, stop and...

Smile as hard as you can.

Not just any smile. The biggest smile you can muster. A smile that would make a clown envious. The big one.

While smiling this smile of all smiles, begin to tap your toes. Whistle or hum one of your favorite tunes. Then force a laugh out loud.

Now how do you feel? You have forgotten the pain and now feel quite good!

You see, the posture of your body, if you can control it, WILL change your state of mind completely. This is because your mind, since birth, has programmed a frown to connect with negative mental states, and a smile to connect with positive mental states. All this technique really does is to reverse the process. It is seldom that you can be really angry and have a smile on your face at the same time (unless you are up to something...)

Positive Somatic Linking can be used to INSTANTLY transform a negative mental condition into a positive mental condition by performing a physical action.

This does not mean that it changes your thinking. It changes the emotions you experience.

Of course, I have no idea what physical actions you perform when you are in a happy frame of mind. So, for the purpose of making an example, let us suppose that you smile broadly, hum your favorite tune and clap your hands.

The next time you catch yourself feeling angry, anxious, and sad or any other negative state you wish to eliminate, stop immediately. Smile broadly. Begin to hum your favorite tune. Clap your hands. (Of course, if you are in a business meeting or any other public place, you may want to excuse yourself and head for the restroom).

The point is that the performance of these physical actions will immediately ARREST your negative mental state of mind and transform it into a positive state of mind. It cannot be otherwise. This is a fantastic technique if you will take the time to learn it and practice it. You will no longer be subject to the garbage your mind throws at you, as you will now be able to control IT, rather than IT controlling YOU! However, this technique can be taken one step further.

The science of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) has developed a technique known as "anchoring". Anchoring primarily involves matching a physical event with an emotion. (I highly recommend that you explore NLP as part of your journey towards creating Heaven On Earth. There are hundreds of websites and a plethora of books and pamphlets that describe how NLP works).

This is nothing new. We naturally "anchor" all the time. How many times have you heard a song that reminded you of a past event? The song is an anchor. You may experience joy at the memory or sadness. It has been burned into your brain by emotion. Do you wish to feel happy. Just put on your happy song!

In our system, Positive Somatic Linking is somewhat like hearing that old song, but with a twist. It works something like this.

Close your eyes and think of a time when you experienced the positive feelings and emotions you wish to experience right now. This past experience should be one of the happiest experiences of your life; a time when you felt exceptionally good about yourself and the world. Build this experience in your mind. Remember how you felt. Imagine this experience as vividly as possible. Build it up and up into a climax.

NOW SMILE AS HARD AS YOU CAN. And, when your mind is at the peak of the positive feelings and mental states you experienced back then, simply perform a physical action you never otherwise perform, such as tapping your thumb and forefinger together 3 times. Open your eyes and think of something else to clear your mind. Then, repeat the process.

Do this a few times. Eventually, your mind will come to associate tapping your fingers together three times with the positive emotional experience and with the BIG SMILE! Once this has been accomplished, you can instantly create a positive state of mind at any time, simply by tapping your fingers together 3 times and putting on that BIG SMILE! How useful could this technique be?

Positive Somatic Linking can be one of the most powerful, life changing tools to be found in our system. But it will not work unless you use it. Try it!

Family Relationships - That keep us burning

Bringing healing to family relationships can be one of the most difficult aspects of the spiritual healing process. The reason for this is that we choose to incarnate within our specific families for the purpose of healing and growth, which often challenges us deeply to the core of our being. For many of us it may feel as though healing is exactly the opposite of what we are receiving with our families, as we endure the difficulties and limitations of our relationships with our parents and siblings.

Before incarnating, we choose families which can bring to the surface specific issues and themes that our soul wishes to explore, learn about and heal. Often these issues are challenging and bring to the surface discomfort that we would prefer go avoid rather than face. Some people deal with this discomfort by placing blame on their parents or the situation they were born into, which provides a temporary outlet for the emotional pain they have experienced, but ultimately prevents the free flow of love, light and healing in the heart.

As we grow personally and spiritually, there comes a time when we are called to release ourselves from the emotional pain we have carried from our childhood. There are steps in this process, which may taker a shorter or longer time, or which may involve many lifetimes of learning.

The first step we take is to become conscious of the pain we are carrying. If we have repressed these feelings, they will emerge when we are ready to face them. Sometimes an event such as an illness or a loss can illuminate feelings we have buried or forgotten. Once we become conscious of the pain and allow ourselves to simply feel it, healing can begin. Being with the pain, and bringing it before God is an essential part of the process. In this way we are not alone, as the divine Creator who is All sees, hears and feels with us. This can be done with prayer, intention, meditation, creative expression, or any way that resonates.

Once we have become more conscious of the pain we carry, the next step involves the willingness to let go of our pain. Though on the surface it may seem strange to want to hold onto pain, there are many deep emotions that can become entrenched within us, and wrapped around our sense of self. We unconsciously hold on to the pain, because it is all we have ever known. For example, if we are carrying anger, hurt or betrayal, we are asked to forgive and to move on. If we were the victim of abuse or neglect, we are asked to let go of our anger, and our entitlement to be angry. This part of the process cannot be rushed, which is why it is so important to be willing to feel our emotions fully first. Once this happens, the next step of healing naturally unfolds.

Once we have traversed these steps of becoming conscious, feeling our pain, and being willing to let it go, then we are fully available to receive a deep and complete healing. As we voluntarily empty ourselves of those things we've been holding onto, more of God’s love and light can enter our heart, mind and body. The pathways of life begin to open up and reveal new directions, new possibilities, and new choices. Our hearts begin to open and love blossoms, forgiveness becomes a way of being, and spiritual awareness awakens within us. These are the gifts that come through healing family relationships, a heart full of love and trust, unencumbered by the pain of the past.

Family and its Importance in our Life

A great number of self-improvement gurus speak of wealth. If you turn on the television, surf the internet, go to the book store and look at the best sellers list, a great number focus on financial well-being. There are those who speak of other aspects of self-improvement; however, the majority promote that which will fill the seats: monetary gain. Even the great Napoleon Hill, of Think and Grow Rich fame, spoke of financial wealth even though he invoked religious and spiritual themes. Of course, he was writing after the Great Depression and almost everyone's focus was on finances at the time. But as one of the more popular sayings goes, it is money that makes the world go 'round. And there is nothing wrong with money. According to Zig Ziglar, the great motivational "encourager," "money is not the most important thing in life, but it is reasonably close to oxygen." An adequate amount of money provides for peace of mind, a house, the bills paid and debtors kept at bay; it simply enables one to provide for family-and if need be-friends.

Money is not the root of all evil, only the people who love it above all else. And this is where a problem arises. In the scheme of things, for you, where does money rate in relationship to other things: family, honesty, integrity, sincerity, valor, trust, all which can be lost or compromised if money is the priority.

What one needs to do in order to become financially successful has been covered time and again by many a guru; however, what is interesting to note is that the greatest lessons one can learn from the pursuit of great financial rewards are offshoots of the pursuit or excellence. Because in order to excel, excel in most areas of life, one must make great sacrifices in time, exert great effort, gain focus and purpose, maintain a serious level of persistence, and overcome the self and self-defeating habits through thorough self-examination and discipline. These things are of a much greater reward and of a much greater eternal significance (these principles last and remain with the individual forever; money and material things are fleeting and temporary), for it is here where one comes to understand the true purpose of life.

"It is one of the strange ironies of this strange life [that] those who work the hardest, who subject themselves to the strictest discipline, who give up certain pleasurable things in order to achieve a goal, are the happiest people."--Brutus Hamilton

It is this being of "the happiest people" that truly and significantly enriches the soul. There are many who are rich but find little joy in life. There are many poor and middle class who live their lives this way too. But great joy abounds in this universe of ours. However, in order to find true joy one must tap into certain universal laws and principles. And I'm not talking "I've just been to Disneyland" joy but joy that lasts a lifetime and then some:

"If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime, help somebody."--Chinese proverb

It is this reaching out to others, this giving of the self that invigorates and enlivens. Time and time and time again stories come out of Hollywood (I use Hollywood because few of our neighbors are being interviewed these days) about first time mothers and fathers and the great joy and purpose therein that they have found. They see for the first time real joy. They see for the first time much greater importance beyond the self. They see for the first time that nothing is more important than a child for whom they would give their lives if need be. Why? Let's examine this truth.

We know that great joy comes from reaching out to help others, but where does the greatest joy reside? Certainly one can find fleeting joys, temporary joys, but where do the long lasting, self-perpetuating joys come from? What is most important to most people. Answer? Family. Spouse. Mother. Father. Son. Daughter. Grandmother. Grandfather. Relations. Consider this point, how long do we grieve for the loss of a car, a job, a favorite piece of clothing or jewelry? Certainly we can experience sadness or depression because of loss here, but do any of them last a lifetime like when we lose a daughter, son, friend, mother, father? Why? Because we lose a bit of ourselves, our humanity, our familia when relations die. It is these lives that give us life. Sustain us. Promote us. Energize us. You can take all the self-help, self-improvement, self-actualization classes you want, but if you lack family, a family that nurtures and encourages, then you are left with little success that matters.

At the foundation of any healthy, successful society is the family.

It is in the family where one needs to learn important truths and principles that will not only aid in creating a stronger family but those principles will be taken into school halls, business meetings, all gatherings public and private to create a better society. It is where one learns discipline, respect for self and others, cooperation, humor, laughter and play.

"Marriage requires collaboration, commitment and a sense of responsibility; these things equip us to choose and to work together towards a "we, us" or " together" orientation. We must strive to develop a deeper knowledge of the importance of the family and family values in Islam in order to deal with the powerful forces that surround us."

We must set aside a special time each week for our family members to enjoy one another, communicate, plan, and study Islam together. Husbands and wives need to spend time together talking and striving to have a sense of humor. They need to exercise self-control because when either of them gets angry and loses control, the effects can be wounding. Our tempers can get us into big problems."

It is here where one learns of "reaching out" to others. This is not something that is or should be taught by schools, governments, communities, public or private institutions. It is in the family where one learns and earns a strong foundation. It is the responsibility of the parents to teach these principles, and if they don't know of them, they need to do their due diligence and learn of them through family, church or private counseling.

It constantly and consistently amazes me that these principles are not common knowledge. Maybe they do need to be taught in schools to parents and then have the children pass them on to their children and so on. And after this has been done for some time the family can take over with a proper, social, emotional, spiritual education.

Interesting to note that the amount and consistency of love, respect and attention that a child receives before the age of five to a great degree determines that child's mental welfare and stability for the remainder of its life.

Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. "Children are an heritage of the Lord" (Psalms 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives-mothers and fathers-will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations."

Nothing outside of the family can make up for any excessive abuse or lack of love within.

Live your own Life

Are you living your life, the way you want to live?

If your reply is in affirmative then you must be a very successful and powerful person in full command of your life and the circumstances. However, if your reply is in negative, then I am sorry to say that you are like millions of other people who are living the life being dictated by others. Is this life worth living?

Let me explain you. Our minds are being bombarded with missiles of "free information" through electronic and print media. Often without knowing, we are doing what others want us to do. Look what are you wearing, what are you eating and how are your behaving. Isn't it not what Miss. Fashions, Miss. Slims and Miss. Manners are telling you? Blindly following someone without using your own mind and common sense can be disastrous.

We the human beings, are no more than robots in the hands of those who are in full control of our lives and are commanding us through the remote control of so-called education, guidance and information. Is this the blessing or the curse of the "information age"? You are the best judge and you know very well how this "information" is affecting your feelings, thoughts and the life as a whole. Of course, you are not you. You have lost your individuality, your creative instinct, and the unique person within you.

Only a small number of people are strong enough to take control of their own lives without being influenced or forced by others, and they are, no doubt, the most powerful and authoritative people on earth. One needs a lot of courage, wisdom and inner strength to live the life in its full bloom, in its originality, in its entirety, and in a dignified and ambitious manner. That's the life worth living!

There is no harm in accepting guidance from others if it is meant for the improvement of life. But be cautious and remain guarded all the time so as not to trap yourself in such a situation where you become the slave of others intentions and find no way out.

No doubt, its your life and you have every right to spend it in your own individual way without any hurdles or barriers from others. Give yourself a chance to nurture your creative qualities in a fear- free and pressure-free climate.

Perfection in Life

What does it mean to be perfect? Many people strive for ‘perfection’ in their life, through their work, their family, and their love lives. All the time we hear about, or are even called ‘perfectionists’, and usually in a negative context. There have been many great humans throughout history that we choose to revere and respect because of their virtuous deeds, but were they perfect? It probably comes down to how you look at it, ‘it’ being perfection.

Nobody’s Perfect is a cool motto that appeared on Lisa Simpson’s hat when TV’s ‘The Simpsons’ (you had better know who they are) family went to Australia . Could imperfections be paradoxically perfect in themselves? If you look close enough at all of the great names in recorded history you will see that besides their crowning achievements they also carried with them the faults and mistakes of the average person. John Lennon beat his first wife, Martin Luther King Jr. had extramarital affairs…Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, Einstein, and even Mother Theresa must have done things that were socially or morally unacceptable.

So, is striving for perfection a pipe-dream when we realize that no matter what our lives are destined to become, there will always be a balance of negative influence in our actions? What about the Buddha? Buddha means ‘perfect one’, and when he supposedly achieved ‘enlightenment’ he no longer had imperfections. But look at what he had to go through to get to that feeling/awareness. Was his life up to that point flawless? No way. If you asked the Buddha about his life I’m sure he’d say right away that he only learnt what he did by making mistakes.

Could it be that we are all already perfect? Everything in the Universe is scientifically balanced. Negative electrons, positive protons, and neutral neutrons do everything they can to balance out in any and every situation imaginable. By that logic, all of our faults and imperfections exist inherently as part of our perfection. How could we ever do the most important work in life (learning to love), if we already know everything?

Everyday we go to work and we do our utmost to do the best job possible. We want things to be perfect. Supposedly no circle ever drawn has been perfectly round. I believe it’s the same with people. You might now be asking, ‘If we are all inherently flawed and have no possibility of attaining a perfect state, what’s the use in even trying? The answer is as simple as two Hydrogen atoms coming together with one Oxygen atom to make a single molecule of water.

We may always have faults, but if we do our best with altruistic intention driving us forward, we will make the world a better place. You may still obsessively eat chocolate but if you write up the achievable ‘2050 Plan for World Peace’, people are going to forgive you. On the other hand, if you sit at home hating yourself because of your chocolate addiction, you aren’t going to help the world, and in essence you’re not going to achieve the balance of energy (both positive and negative) that you require to attain satisfaction in your life.

Within paradox there is always the other side of the coin and so I have to suggest yet another perspective. If everything in the Universe is already balanced then doesn’t that imply that no matter what we do, good or bad, we will balance out evenly? It depends upon what size picture you’re analyzing. If you’re looking at human society as a whole you might choose to believe that for every person that is a little bit more negative than positive (with their thoughts and actions), that there will be another person in the world who is a little bit more positive than negative. If more of humanity is positive than negative, maybe the balance of energies could show up elsewhere, like in our surrounding environment?

The point of this article is to get you to question your desire for a perfect life. Maybe it already is. Maybe you are already aware of it. If life was all happiness and joy we wouldn’t know what happiness and joy were, as we’d have nothing to compare them to. If we never made mistakes, how would we know we were even learning anything? What would a life be without the experience of learning? What would it amount to?

There’s no need to try and be perfect. Either you already are perfect, or you will never achieve perfection. There is a point in doing the best you can everyday, even if today that simply means getting out of bed. If everyone who ever lived had doubted their abilities because they had faults, nothing great would ever have been done. If everyone compared themselves to people who have already come and gone and achieved greatness, then no one would have had the courage to follow their dreams, goals, and purposes. If Einstein had compared himself to Da Vinci, and subsequently been scared into inaction, we would never have gained the knowledge that he shared with the rest of us. Einstein wasn’t perfect. My bet is he probably had a few problems with his personal hygiene, you know, cutting his nostril and ear hairs. Still, this isn’t often commented upon compared to the Theory of Relativity. He could also have gotten down on himself for being a ‘lowly’ patent clerk. I’m glad he didn’t.

You were born into the Universe, and you were blessed with some great skills and talents, even if you haven’t discovered them yet. Like me you have probably stopped yourself before taking a big risk in your life because you compared yourself to one of your heroes, gurus, icons, or role-models. You most probably doubt you’re abilities at times, and because of that doubt you don’t attempt an opportunity that life has given you. Forget those other people. They aren’t better than us. They are, and were the same. They are a perfect balance of energies. The only difference is that despite their perfect imperfections, they still did their best to work for the betterment of the world. It’s time we all realized that we were put here for a reason, even if it’s only a small anonymous role to play, and that attaining perfection is as simple as doing the best that you can to change a tiny part of the world.

Summary: What does it mean to be perfect? Many people strive for ‘perfection’ in their life, through their work, their family, and their love lives. There have been many great humans throughout history that we choose to revere and respect because of their virtuous deeds, but were they perfect? If everyone who ever lived had doubted their abilities because they had faults, nothing great would ever have been done.

By Jesse S. Somer

Jesse S. Somer is a perfectly imperfect human being just like you. It’s time he just did the best he could, instead of comparing himself to his role-models. They were, and are, perfectly imperfect too.

The thing that called Happiness

I think my strongest memories begin in college. I don’t understand these individuals who remember sliding out of the birth canal, for me much of my life is shadows. It’s not the easiest thing to live with, as quite often I tend to feel like life just started for me, but it is what it is. The mind works in mysterious ways and does everything it can to protect itself I suppose, and some events can do far more damage if remembered and lived again and again.

College – the time when boys become men and girls women. The time when we begin to specialize and grow up. The time when we meet people from all walks of life. That first year was hell. The main problem was this – I hated life. In fact, I didn’t even realize I was alive. Not really. My life was one of pain and suffering. Heck, the only things I had loved were one cat which my mother had put to sleep to ‘teach me a lesson’ and then the cat that would later save my life – which my mother at one point threw off the balcony claiming that a particularly strong wind had managed to open the door, scoop up the kitty, lift it up over the solid porch railings, 6 inch ledge, for the two story drop (the cat lived). So it’s not like I had a role model for living.

And now, here I was with a roommate who just went on and on about how perfect her life was, how much her parents loved her, and how everything in the world needs to be flowers and ballerinas. Everything was pink and frilly and satiny and I hated her. I hated her because, well, admittedly she was obnoxious and not just by my standards but also, even if it wasn’t true, she portrayed everything I had wanted – solid family, the chance to be a little girl and princess, and a life that didn’t involve digging through garbage cans for dinner or living out of a car.

If emo was around in my day, I’m sure that’s what my friends and I would have been defined as. Dark and brooding we despised those who were ‘happy’ or talked about ‘fun.’ Couldn’t they see all the hurt out there? How could they walk past the homeless on the street as they made their way into a restaurant to laugh and talk and enjoy each other’s company? Where was the misery they deserved, and needed to recognize existed?

Of course at the time I just had never really experienced what it is to be ‘happy’ and despised anyone who did. Now I realize its usefulness. The stress of brooding and hating destroys the body – happy people live more. I’m all about life nowadays.

Albert Sweitzer once said that, “Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory." I love that. My past has greatly colored my view of the world, which I chronicle in my blog. I’m fighting against living in those shadows and seeing the world through darkness. It never helped that the definitions of happiness are nebulous at best. Per dictionary.com happiness is, “good fortune; pleasure; contentment; joy."

One quote on happiness that really hit home for me is from Leo Buscaglia, noted professor and author. He stated that, “What we call the secret of happiness is no more a secret than our willingness to choose life." I think that explains why now I smile, and I don’t hate those who are happy. Happiness exists for a reason – and that reason is life. In all honesty when you need help, do you go to the person giving the world an evil eye or the one who’s smiling? People prefer to be around happy people, and the joy spreads from there. Happy people can help more than those wallowing in their own misery. I think a turning point in my life was recognizing happiness as a valid choice that I could achieve and that could help those people we ignore, but to do so, I first had to recognize I was alive.

Life is the toughest thing we’ll every have to face. When I looked at these people in college, I thought how easy they must have had life, and that’s why they could be happy. I tried to figure out how to recreate that – was it that they had more money than me? I mean, the people who always seemed to be smiling were the ones with a lot of money, look at Hollywood . Maybe it was the food they ate, or their clothes, or that they played sports. I became even more frustrated that as I was able to develop a lifestyle for myself that mimicked theirs – fancier clothes, real food not processed government cheese – I still wasn’t happy.

Which leads me to Albert Camus who said, “You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life." My focusing on happiness as some quantifiable object made it elusive. Plus, it had me doubting if I was really happy, or could be EVEN happier. Happiness is a life state. Now I’m amazed that if I think about it, I’m happy. And why am I happy? Because I am alive. Yeah, my health is okay, I have a good job, and I’m around happy people. But I don’t hate them or envy them, I just recognize them. And this very act of being in the moment and breathing in the life around me has somehow brought with it happiness.

So what is happiness? It’s the realization that you are alive. Also, the acceptance of happiness as a valid feeling. It’s like the sun that shines through after a storm, like hope which sprang forth from Pandora ’s Box to kiss away our wounds. Happiness is out there and won’t be found if you search for it, but only when you search for yourself. Happiness is just another part of life, just like the darkness I lived in for so long. And is life a struggle? Oh yeah, it isn’t for the weak. But with it come so many wonderful rewards, happiness among them.

Mysteries for Lonliness

Ask people to sum up what happiness is in a few words and you'll get a variety of answers plus a few furrowed brows. It's a subjective topic, with parameters that are only defined within ourselves. Which is why I say that happiness is the loneliest of mysteries, as we each have to find the answers alone that are meaningful to us.

Let me give you an example here. When I was wee, my family went to a marine park. We settled down that afternoon to watch the dolphin show. I was thrilled watching them leap through hoops, stand on their tails, etc, at the command of the instructor. It just took my breath away, how beautiful and smart they were.

The instructor asked if any of the children in the audience would like to come down, kneel at the side of the pool and get a surprise. I was up like a shot, only to feel my mum tugging on the back of my shirt, saying not to. She knew what was going to happen and I didn't!

Mum said something along the lines of how I'd be soaking wet by the end of it, and would need to walk about in wet clothes all day. Did I care? Not a bit! I just wanted to see what the surprise was.

I could see the other kids lined up along the edge of the pool, and heard the instructor asking if there was anyone else. My pleading increased in urgency, realising I was going to miss my chance here of whatever the fabulous surprise was. My dad said " Oh, let her do it," (probably tired of listening to me asking by now) so Mum relented, smiling and shaking her head resignedly. Yippee! I ran excitedly down to the poolside before they changed their minds.

All us kids knelt down at the edge of the poolside, concentrating on looking into the water as directed, leaning as close as we could dare without falling in. I could see the dolphins swimming under the water, faster and faster streaking towards us then just as they reached where all the kids were ...Whoosh!!!! They leapt into the air in a graceful arc over the high bar and landed right beside us.

The splashdown created flying water everywhere, and of course, because we kids all so close and so near water level, we got drenched with it, absolutely soaked through!! The audience laughed, gasped, applauded, screeched (mostly the mums thinking of pneumonia, I think, that was.)

Shocked by the cold water but gasping through my delighted laughter, I ran the whole way back to my seat, dripping water from my clothes, my hair, everywhere, shivering but thrilled to bits. Even my mum was laughing at my obvious delight, despite her initial disapproval.

When I eventually settled down, I was surprised to see that other kids that had just done the same thing as me a few rows down were bawling their eyes out and obviously distressed. How could they not have liked that !?!? Strange indeed. It was great, how could they possibly not have had fun?

So what for me had been a glorious experience, for some had been scary and upsetting. I was happy but they definitely weren't.

Many times, what makes people happy or unhappy is just not what we expect. We assume that they are just like us, as I did that day at the marine park. Of course they are not, as we are all unique. That doesn't mean they are wrong or that we are because their path to happiness is not like ours -we are just taking different routes. It can cause confusion when we have different standards though that haven't been voiced.

Maybe that explains why happiness seems to be such an elusive quality to many of us - if we can't even agree on a definition of happiness, then seeking a commonality of sorts is nigh impossible. Again, this is why it's a search that is personal and individual that you alone can do.

The bad news is that no one can hand you happiness on a platter. The good news is that happiness is what you choose it to be! When you find it within yourself, it radiates from you. When you share that radiance, or another shares it with you, it's wonderful. The best advice on seeking it out? I'd say listen to your heart, it knows the way. You may even solve that mystery once and for all.

I leave you with the wise words of Benjamin Franklin. Why not choose to make your day a happy one!

Happiness consists more in small conveniences or pleasures that occur every day, than in great pieces of good fortune that happen but seldom to a man in the course of his life. --Benjamin Franklin

Live as a Child

Is it really possible to rediscover the joy, that carefree attitude that most of us remember from our childhood? Nothing in adult life is fashioned to encourage us to take pleasure in the simple things in life anymore. Should we? More importantly, could we even if we wanted to?

I had not loved enough. I’d been busy, busy, so busy, preparing for life, while life floated by me, quiet and swift as a regatta. –Lorene Cary.

How quickly time passes, doesn't it? It seems only yesterday that I was sixteen and planning for the future. Thoughts of university, work, boyfriends and whether my friends really were my friends filled my adolescent head. That was over twenty five years ago and it's passed in the blink of an eye.

If I think back over my life to when I was young, pondering all my hopes and dreams for the future, they seem so simplistic and idealistic now. I wanted love, happiness and security. I thought that by the time I was thirty, which then seemed so old, everything in my life would be perfect.

Of course, life never runs as smoothly as that. Many trials and tribulations seem to seek to thwart us and weigh us down.We lose sight of the hopes and dreams that we held for our future just by getting on with our daily lives. So much time is spent at work, home and on the family, organizing, planning, dealing with small and not so small crises when they arise. One day we turn round and what was once a fire in our belly is now realization that it turned to ashes because we forgot to tend to it.

But phoenix-like, we can rise again. Free will is a double edged sword. The choices that we made in life, of our own free will, that diminished those hopes and dreams, are in the past now. We can choose differently at any given moment.

Regret for those choices is a waste of time and emotion I feel, because they were the only ones we could have made at that particular moment. Even what we may have perceived as ‘bad’ choices at a later date, were still our conscious choices….that’s why we chose them then, at that time, because they seemed the ‘right’ thing to do. They weren’t bad choices, they were just choices.

We can use that same free will to decide to do it differently. Today, now, in the present. Spend time on yourself, doing what you want to help you realize those hopes and dreams, rather that what you feel you ‘must’.

It’s a question of perception. There are no "must"s, just our own interpretation of our priorities. Too often it takes a crisis in our lives for us to recognize that and really see clearly how much time we have wasted on the mundane. Life is for living and loving, not just a way to pass the hours until we run out of it. No one can be sure of how much time they have, so it makes sense to live life to the full in all its glory.

A day out-of- doors, someone I loved to talk with, a good book and some simple food and music — that would be rest. –Eleanor Roosevelt

We can gain much pleasure from the simple things in life, as we did as children.Take time to stop and smell the roses. Show love to your family and friends and be sure to tell them. Be kind to all that you meet.

We don’t need to wait for the crisis to happen to decide to live life in a more peaceful, contented way. We can choose to do it today. Appreciate, acknowledge, and be thankful for every day.

He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and loved much . . . who has filled his niche and accomplished his task; who has left the world better than he found it, whether an improved poppy, a perfect poem, or a rescued soul. –Bessie Anderson Stanley

I said at the beginning that I look back at how I felt when I was young and think it was simplistic. On further reflection, I don’t. I think it was right. It was my pure thoughts before I was tainted by ‘normal life’. The competitiveness, the greed, the deceit, the manipulation that are seen as acceptable to most.

If that’s normal life, I’d rather choose to discard it and live again as a child, in the days where nothing was impossible and achieving hopes and dreams was a certainty, not a dim memory.

Make today a day for family. Live it as a child. Spend more time with the kids and grandkids than in the kitchen, forget about the dishes for a while and enjoy just being around your loved ones. Choose to step away from any conflict you see arising and remember how blessed you are to have family and friends in your life when so many are alone. Recall good times instead.

Today is a great day to shape memories, have fun and share love and laughter.

Spiritual Intimacy

My passion for you burns like the heat of a thousand suns. Life without you is no life at all. I wander shamelessly hoping to feel your presence as I take on my daily tasks. If I searched for you and you were not there, I would wither and die. I need you like the desert needs the rain. Without your love to sustain me, I am a walking corpse.

Finding you was the best thing to ever happen to me. I never knew I was lost until you showed me your way. I relinquished control of my own life and gave my life to you. I'd give my life for you, yes, I am willing to die for you. I have never known such love before and to lose your love would be to lose my life. You are the air I breathe. You are the morning dew on a rose petal. You are the twinkles on a starry night. You are the reason for my inner peace and outer happiness.

When I do not feel your presence, I pray just to know you are there. I have never known such contentment before and it's all because of you. When I awaken from a restful sleep, the smile escaping my lips is for you; the cat-like stretching is because of you; the flinging of limbs and torso before climing out of bed was all made possible by you. I am immersed in you and have no life without you. You're in my head, heart and soul. I have never been so dependent on anyone in my entire life as I depend on you. You're wonderful! You're awesome! You're amazing! You've never let me down. Never! I wish I could say the same for me where you are concerned but you've never treated me differently when I know I've disappointed you. Thank you.

Like the sails need the wind for the Windjammer to glide across the blue seas, I need you to make it through each day. Without you, I can do nothing, like a ship without a sail, I am nothing. I find refuge in time of storms and trouble, in you. I can nestle in your arms and find comfort when afraid. I fear not when I ask for your help because you have never failed me, not once.

You are the center of my joy! My lifeline! If I had ten thousand tongues, I'd praise you with every one of them because you are worthy of praise. I am in total submission to you. You may do with me as you please. My purpose in life is to please only you. I'm desperate for you. Thank you for your promises to me. I know without doubt but with absolute certainty, you will fulfill them.

May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart always be acceptable to you, my Lord and Savior.

A Happiness

What do you think about happiness? A philosophical approach to life, an intellectual activity or an academical pursuit. No, not at all, nothing of the sort.

Happy living is nothing more than living a normal life free from undue pressures, problems and tensions. The Art of Happy Living is not a complicated kind of art difficult to learn rather a simple art of living well, eating well, thinking well and feeling well. Just tune up your mind to enjoy every moment of life and let the happiness follow you.

Happiness is purely an internal matter. It has nothing to do with your external circumstances. Most people do the fatal mistake of looking outwards for happiness rather than looking inwards. Only fools worry about the circumstances on which they have no control. Why worry if you cannot change the weather, rather enjoy it whether its hot, humid, cold, cloudy, foggy or snowy. Keep your internal weather pleasant all the time. Don’t allow external matters to take your smiles away.

The feeling of happiness is within you. There is something positive within you which keeps you happy and there is something negative within you which keeps you unhappy. That “something" needs to be looked into thoroughly. If you want to live a happy life then get rid of the negative “something" which makes you unhappy. Negative approach always complicates the problems and increases unhappiness.

Happy living is the reward of positive thinking. Remember, only the positive thinking can bring happiness in your life. If you cannot think positively, you cannot live happily. Be your own coach and adviser. Look everything with a positive angle. Find something good even in most critical moments of your life. Make positive thinking the basis of your happy living.

Happiness is all around. Its not far away from you. If you do not want to live happy, its upto you. Its your own choice. Don’t blame others. Don’t blame your fate or external circumstances.